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September
23, 2008 No. 48 Vol. 86
Today’s
Program: Karnak the Magnificent
Today, at
the special invitation of President Markus Mittermayr, we have a special
guest from the east. Karnak the Magnificent comes to us from his small
but hallowed village located in the hinterlands east of Philadelphia. He
most recent sabbatical has kept him from us for many years so we ask for
your undivided attention. Karnak has previously graced us with his
presence bringing his worldly knowledge and his string of camels so as
to amaze us with his mystical powers and today he will unleash his most
incredible mind to predict the exact date and time of the retirement of
Markus Mittermayr as President of this club. Not only will he amaze you,
but for your financial gain he has promised to predict the downfall of
Lehman Brothers and the acquisition of Merrill Lynch (do not be so rude
as to tell him that that this has already happened). His local advisor
and confidant, Farouk Rasheed Feaster, the former bouncer at the Baghdad
Hooters and the past chairman of Bald Bankers of Baghdad, will be
handling security for this event and introducing our guest. Please
welcome, Karnak the Magnificent.
Last Week
at Kiwanis
John
Romano, Sports Columnist for the St. Petersburg Times, was introduced by
the Kiwanian of the Day, Tom Nelson. John, born and raised in St.
Petersburg and a graduate of Dixie Hollins High School, entertained us
with several stories involving local, national, and international
interest.
His first
beat for the Times was to cover University of Florida athletics.
While at a reception at President Lombardi’s palatial mansion he and
another reporter from the Miami Herald scooped their competition
with a story about the university’s response to a NCAA investigation.
While he admired Steve Spurrier and his body of work, like many members
of the press, he never got to know him, even after five years of
coverage. He described him as a “different guy” and “highly
competitive”. Sports figures that John admires are Tony Gwynn, Martina
Navratilova, and Tony Dungy. Another personality he respects is Richie
McKay, former General Manager of the Bucs. He described McKay as “smart”
towards the media and “very accommodating”. Finally, of all the team
sports, he feels baseball players give reporters the most access, and
conversely the NFL is all about the party line, likening it to the
Soviet newspaper, Pravda.
When
asked about increased parity in college athletics, John pointed to
reduced scholarships and more television coverage as the answer. He used
the USF football program as a classic example for the reasons stated for
their meteoric rise to prominence.
John’s
opinion of Joe Maddon has turned 180 degrees in three years. His initial
reaction to Maddon as a manager was that he was too lenient and lax and
gave the impression of being a good cop. But this year, Maddon is like
the new sheriff in town. John’s favorite instance of the new Maddon
discipline is when he pulled B.J. Upton from his centerfield position
after Upton failed to hustle on a groundout. After the early September
game in Boston that the Rays won in 14 innings, John had his best story
of the Ray’s magical season.
He also
related that reporters cannot and should not have favorites due to
conflict of interest. And a reporter hopes for the following:
A good
story
Talkative
players and coaches
A late
game that finishes before the reporter’s deadline
While
John indeed enjoys his craft, he is concerned for the future of
newspaper as the Internet has impacted the readership. After learning
about the true nature of Pete Rose, he advised us to view our idols from
a distance.
What’s
Happening:
Installation Banquet:
- See the Bulldog, Markus Mittermayr, hand off the reins to the Gator,
Biff Baker. Amazingly, our club has survived the leadership of two
“Dawgs grads”, proving that lightning can strike twice. Don’t miss the
party on September 30 at the St. Petersburg Yacht Club.
Al Muter
Scholarship :
- Kudos to Frank Ranieri for buying Rays tickets and donating $100 to
the club. And the Rays won the game in a thrilling come-from-behind
victory over the dastardly Red Sox.
Sponsored
Youth:
- Cindy Mulligan has announced that our club has agreed to sponsor the
Key Club at Shorecrest. We also sponsor the Key Club at St. Petersburg
High School and a Circle K at USF – St. Petersburg.
Board of
Directors:
Congratulations to Worth Blackwell and Guy Van Middlesworth elected last
week to our Board of Directors.
Happy
Workers:
Saturday, September 27 is the Book Fair. Call Jane Baldwin to volunteer.
Watch for the signup sheet at this week’s meeting.
Profile
of New Member – Gary Keller
Gary
Keller, lifelong resident of St. Petersburg , has joined our club
recently. Currently Gary lives on Snell Isle with his wife, Barbara. At
6’ 9” tall, Gary is hard to miss.
As one
can believe, he was a basketball player and led Dixie Hollins High
School to two state titles. Upon graduation he received a scholarship to
the University of Florida and was twice ALL-SEC, and proudly, he says,
SEC All-Academic his senior year.
Basketball led Gary to the nomadic life of the ABA where he matched up
against the likes of Rick Barry, Connie Hawkins, Larry Brown and Doug
Moe.
Currently, Gary owns and operates a high-end custom closet company,
Liberty Closets, working along with his son, Brett. His daughter,
Kathleen, who lives in Tampa, blessed Gary and Barbara with two
grandchildren.
Welcome
to the club, Gary, and we hope to see you at many meetings.
Today’s
Quiz
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Define the Pythagorean Theorem.
-
In
professional baseball, what is the length between home plate & first
base? Between first base & second base? Between home plate and
second base in a straight line? (Hint: Use the Pythagorean Theorem
to find the answer.)
-
Name
the twelve Disciples of Christ:
-
Name
the shortest poem ever written and the Author.
Last
Week’s Quiz
-
John
McCain was born in the Canal Zone.
-
Peter
Finch
was the actor who said in the movie Network, “I am mad as
hell, and I am not going to take it any more.”
-
In
the continental United States the 2 states that are the furthest
apart and separated by only one time zone are Florida (panhandle
in Central Time Zone) and Oregon (eastern part in Mountain Time
Zone).
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The
main reason the New York Yankees left their spring training site in
St. Petersburg and moved to Fort Lauderdale was because the
Soreno Hotel would only allow white players to be their guests.
If you would like to submit questions for a future
quiz, please send your queries to me at
dlampe@tampabay.rr.com.
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